Moving through Life’s Changes, and It’s All Okay
I’m glad to be back here at Bee Wild writing again. The last few months have been filled with changes, and I’m glad that I made the choice, and Bee Wild supported me, to take care of myself. If I had one wish for you at this time, it would be that you, too, have team mates, family members, and friends who allow you to move through life’s changes at your own pace. These are the folk who help you know that, “It’s All Okay.”
When you mature on the path, you begin to understand a few things about life. But, this wisdom doesn’t always prepare you for abrupt changes like a health scare or the sudden death of a parent. We’ve been dealing with both sets of circumstances, and I want to share a couple of thoughts I have with you.
Not Good, Not Bad
When we were overwhelmed with decisions we didn’t want to make, it was difficult to find center. If you are anything like me, you know the aware thing to do is to kick into neutral. But, what really happens when the medical committee brings your spiritual partner and you into a room and says, “Nothing can be done that fits with your Dad’s wishes.”? And, a little later after many explanations of what we were looking at, “Yes, that’s right. We are asking you whether we can remove the machines that are keeping your Dad’s body going.”? All you can think of is, “Do they mean now? Right now? Lord, I’m not ready.” When you are faced with a life and death decision that feels like it’s going to break your heart, how do you come to a place of faith, because isn’t that what the neutral place is? Isn’t faith the place where you know that no matter what is going on at the moment, you are still a beloved child of the Divine, and that it’s all okay?
One of my wisest mentors talks about being an observer of your circumstances. I still hear him say, “This is what’s happening. It’s not good for me. It’s not bad for me.” But, when one is attached and feeling pain, grief, anger, frustration, confusion, how do you get to that place? Can you get to that place? Initially, I know we didn’t. But, we did allow ourselves to express our feelings, no matter what they were. The acceptance of what was happening and how we felt about it certainly felt like a step in the right direction.
It’s All Okay
I was doing some quiet contemplation about the events of the last few months the other day. I had a vision of my spiritual mentor, sitting in a room, waiting for me to walk in. So, I entered and crossed the room to where he sat. He asked me how I was. It told him about what’s been happening, how I felt about it. He looked at me with so much acceptance, gave me a big bear hug, and then said, “It’s all okay.”
And, isn’t that what we really want to hear? No matter how emotional we are, no matter how tough the circumstances, don’t we just want someone to tell us that it’s okay, that we are okay?
In a world where nothing is permanent and everything changes, we can always be sure that we are always okay. Whatever emotion you experience won’t be a forever feeling. Whatever circumstance you are in, it won’t last. As part of helping other family members through their grief, my partner quoted one of our favorite mentors, Les Brown:
This circumstance has not come to stay, it has come to pass.
Just as the leaves on a tree go through seasons of change, may you understand that change is natural, that it’s a part of life, and that no matter what is going on, it’s all okay.